If you are being stalked or threatened by a stranger, acquaintance, current or ex-partner, it is important to take it seriously! Stalking in Iowa is a CRIME and can be a misdemeanor or felony, depending on the level of abuse. Do all that you can to keep safe and don’t face stalking alone. There are police, personal protection orders (restraining orders), shelter services, and advocacy/support services to help you. Always remember to rely on your instincts and seek immediate help if you feel you are in danger.
Any of the following things are signs that you might be in danger or that your safety is in jeopardy:
• Being followed
• Receiving threatening or unwanted e-mails, phone calls, mail, or notes
• Having your car, bike or other belongings tampered with or destroyed
• Receiving unwanted gifts
• Tampering of your home, work area or car, so that you know someone has been there
• Observing a person who is following you in your neighborhood, where your work or go to school, and/or in public places that you frequent
• Injury to your pets and/or children, or actual or symbolic references (threats) to harming them
• Other actions that are done to instill fear in you
The risks to your safety are higher if the person stalking you: (a) has weapons, (b) has threatened suicide or has threatened to kill you, (c) has told you about a history of hurting others, and/or (d) has previously physically or sexually assaulted you.
As always, if you feel you are in danger don’t hesitate to contact someone for immediate help. Threats and stalking – even from someone you feel is not a “ real” danger – can result in a harmful situation.
Write down the details of any threats made or harm done to you (include the date, time, and description), and record them in a notebook or journal. If there are witnesses, point out these things so others become more aware of and remember the incident. Be sure to write down the name(s) of any witnesses in your notebook. If you saw the details of the perpetrator at the incident (such as clothing, distinguishing features, behaviors, etc.) write that down too.
There are some stalking cases where you never talk to the person. If this is the case, do not initiate contact with this person, especially if doing so could increase your chances of being harmed. But if you know the person, or have had contact before, make an assertive statement to leave you alone. Be clear and be brief. Do not engage in a lengthy conversation or listen to their words – end the conversation soon after your assertive statement. Walk away or hang up. Once this has been stated, it is their responsibility to respect your wishes and leave you alone. You should not have to keep telling them to leave you alone. However, if you know the person or have had contact in the past but you feel threatened or harassed, if may be safer not to talk with them at all. Being friendly in an effort to avoid being "rude" could increase your danger.
You may also want to consider getting a personal protection order (PPO). This is a legal document that is signed by a judge, telling the person who is stalking you to leave you alone. In order to get a PPO, you need to know the name of the person stalking you. PPO’s can be obtained through a private attorney, through a Clerk of Court office, or, in many areas you can contact a local domestic violence center, which will help you complete the form free of charge. For more information about PPO’s see our webpage “Legal procedures and University policies for your rights and protection.”
You have the right to call the police. They will want to know details of the assault or threat and if you have a PPO. If they say there is nothing they can do for you, call a local shelter advocate to help you. Sometimes there is nothing the police can legally do, but at other times, they might be able to intervene depending on the situation.
Tell your friends, family, and co-workers. The more people know about it, the safer you may be. If you keep the problem a secret, the person stalking you can become more powerful in the ways they threaten you. You don’t want it to remain a secret between you and the stalker. You have nothing to be embarrassed about if someone is bothering you this way. Telling other people may save your life.
If you have a suspicion that someone is following or stalking you, trust your instincts. Download and use the following form to track incidents of possible stalking. This will help you record the details of any incidents and will be useful if you choose to take further protective measures down the road.
Create your own Stalking Safety Plan*
If you feel you are being harassed, stalked, or threatened, or if you know someone who is, you can download and fill out the following Stalking Safety Plan. This form will help you identify to whom you can turn for help and what steps you personally can take to make yourself safer.
Create your own Stalking Safety Plan
If you think you may be the victim of a hate crime you can contact police, campus police/security, or a local crisis center advocacy program for assistance. Hate crimes include crimes motivated by biases based on race, religion, sexual orientation, ethnicity/national origin, and disability.
If you have experienced a hate crime you have the choice to report it or to keep it confidential. No matter how insignificant you think it is, the following is a list of reasons why it can be helpful to report even the most minor hate crime:
• Incidents that are seemingly minor initially – name calling, homophobic graffiti, racist slurs – can escalate into more serious incidents, including violence, if unaddressed.
• If unchecked, perpetrators may feel comfortable in continuing their behavior and may feel justified in pushing the envelope a little further each time.
• Non-reporting fosters an atmosphere where bias and prejudice is accepted and tolerated.
• Bias-motivated incidents send a message to not only the individual(s) on the receiving end, but to all members of the targeted group.
• Even if the perpetrator is unknown or action to address the incident is limited, reporting allows the University to maintain statistical records of acts of intolerance in order to better assess the campus climate and implement appropriate remediation measures.
How to report a Hate Act :
• You can contact a local crisis center or campus police to report and discuss your options.
• If you would like to speak with a confidential source at the University of Iowa you can contact any of these offices/individuals.
• If you believe you have been subjected to discrimination in violation of The University of Iowa Human Rights Policy, you may file either informal or formal complaints with the Office of Equal Opportunity and Diversity at The University of Iowa, 319-335-0705 (voice) 319-335-0697 (text).
For more information about University procedures visit:
www.uiowa.edu/%7Eeod/resolving/discrimination.html
The University of Iowa Department of Public Safety offers a free and safe transportation service to female students downtown and on campus routes. The service runs nightly from 10pm – 3am (campus routes Sunday – Wednesday and downtown routes Thursday – Saturday) and they will not check student IDs before accepting riders. You can call Nite Ride (to arrange a ride or find pick-up/drop-off locations) at: 319-384-1111 or visit their website for more information at: http://www.uiowa.edu/~pubsfty/nite.htm. If you feel you are unsafe and would like assistance in getting around campus or downtown Iowa City don’t hesitate to access this service.
For numerous links to resources about hate crimes on campuses, hate crime prevention, and national and community organizations working to prevent hate crimes, visit: http://www.stophate.org/resources.html
For an in-depth U.S. Department of Justice report on stalking and domestic violence, visit: http://www.ncjrs.gov/pdffiles1/ojp/186157.pdf
*This safety plan was adapted from information given by the National Center for Victims of Crime and the University of Wisconsin Stout: http://www.uwstout.edu/cvpp/safety_plan-stalking.html
**This information is adapted from the University of California Sacramento Women’s Resource Center webpage: http://www.csus.edu/wrc/hate_crimes/ and the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign Tolerance webpage: http://www.odos.uiuc.edu/tolerance/reporting.asp
